Today, my grandmother, Ruth Gustafson, passed away. I didn't really know how sick she was- she didn't suffer, at least not long, and it turns out she had lung cancer. No one knew. I guess she didn't either. This is my Dad's Mom. My grandfather passed away some eight years ago. I didn't go to his funeral and it looks like I won't be going to hers either. See, we live in Alabama and they are in the UP of Michigan. It's about more than that, however. There is more than a physical distance between there and here. There is an emotional distance as well. My Dad isn't close to his brothers/sisters (well one brother he is closer to but that's about it). As a military family- we had each other and that was about it. No cousins, uncles, aunts, grandparents (my mother's parent's died when she was 19 & 24- I didn't know either of them). But anyway- I can count the number of times that I spent with my grandmother on my two hands. But these last visits, where she and booger got to spend time together were the best. I realized that I loved her and that she was a good person after all and well if that isn't something good I don't know what is. I pray to God that she is with Him in heaven now. With my Grandfather - and that peace surrounds her, holds her and loves her eternally. And I pray that my father is going to be ok through all of this. His love for my Mom and me & my sisters and my daughter is felt- and I hope he knows that we understand that he is hurting now. I don't know what to say to him- but I will pray that he is comforted in his loss. It's my loss too, but mostly his.
We still decorated the tree today. Booger loves Christmas and I know that my grandma would have wanted us to keep up our traditions. This Christmas we will remember grandma- everyday we will. No regrets Grandma. No regrets.